


Third Chance

by IngridAnne24



Category: Jane the Virgin (TV)
Genre: Gen, Hinted at Jane/Petra
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-19
Updated: 2017-10-19
Packaged: 2019-01-19 23:45:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12420678
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IngridAnne24/pseuds/IngridAnne24
Summary: Petra's thoughts from 4x01





	Third Chance

**Author's Note:**

> I was trying to understand what Petra was thinking when she got back together with Rafael. Maybe she does love him, but I can't help but feel like something bad is going to happen between them.
> 
> Also I personally think Petra is gay as hell so
> 
> Also, they need to stop putting Petra through trauma

It happened so fast. One moment her sister was pointing a gun at her, the next they were both in the water. She barely registered the gunshot and when she saw blood in the water, dimly lit by the moon and lights on the pier, her first thought was she had been shot. She felt no pain, but maybe she was in shock. 

Simultaneously checking her body and trying to swim against the current, she found no wounds. It must have been Anezka, who was nowhere to be seen.

Petra wasn't the best swimmer, despite living in Miami for a decade. She never had time to actually go swimming. But instincts kept her head above water as she tried to figure out what to do next. She considered trying to find Anezka, but even if she really wanted to, she couldn't see anything and decided it was a lost cause.

She was now too far away from the pier and was starting to panic. Do sharks come this close to land? How cold does the water get at night? How cold does it have to be before hypothermia sets in? She started to think of the girls, how she had spend so much time and effort in making sure they had a good, loving home, making sure she wasn't like her mother. She still struggled, but she knew the girls loved her and that's what mattered.

Then she thought about Rafael, who probably still loved Jane, despite what he said. Even if he didn't like Jane the way he said he did, Petra could tell Jane felt something for him, and even though she wouldn't act on it if Petra and Rafael were together, it was always going to be there. It was always going to hang over all of them.

Did she, Petra, truly love Rafael? She always, and will always, felt affection for him. He was a decent guy, he was the father of her daughters, he understood her in ways most people didn't. But it felt exactly the same way as when their relationship first started, the optimism, the comfort. It's how all of Petra's relationships started, and they always blew up in her face. For Rafael... at least they connected, but was that enough? Was it ever enough? For Petra, anyway, she never felt fully satisfied, like there was something missing.

But Petra would rather be with Rafael than be alone. Anything was better than being alone.

She thought about Jane, who had the love her life until he was ripped away from Jane. Petra never told Jane this, but Petra cried when she found out about Michael's death. They weren't incredibly close, but he did save Petra once, and Petra never forgot that. But she cried for Jane, who didn't deserve that. Why she never told Jane, she didn't know. Probably because she didn't like admitting weakness to anyone, not even Jane, who often saw through Petra's toughness.

As for Jane and Rafael, Petra couldn't ignore the jealous feeling she felt whenever she saw them together. And she hated feeling like that because it just made her annoyed with both of them, the only two people who understood her. Obviously her annoyance was more directed at Jane, since Petra was feeling jealous of her, because she wanted to be with Rafael. That had to be it.

Or was it? What else could it be? 

Petra's train of though went off when she looked around and realized she didn't know where she was. The current was still pulling her and seemed to be getting stronger (or she was starting to get tired). She had been swimming for a while now and she didn't know how late it was. She was glad she lived in Florida, where the water temperature didn't get too cold, but it was still cold enough. A strong shiver went through her body.

She started to swim parallel to the shore, whatever shore it was and tried to find a spot away from the current. 

How did she getting herself into these things? Bad luck seemed to just follow her. Sure, a lot of the things that happened to her were self-inflicted, but not everything. She was in this mess because she thought Rafael wanted to talk to her. Going back even further it was because she trusted her sister four years ago. Yeah, her sister hated her because Petra inadvertently caused the death of Anezka's husband, as well as pushed his dead body. Not great. But, Petra still didn't think she deserved almost getting shot and on the verge of drowning.

Petra imagined herself as a bloated corpse and decided that was not going to happen. She had too much to live for and as soon as she got back to land, she was going to have a serious talk with Rafael.

She could already see the tinge of light on the horizon. It was already pretty late when she left the party, but she didn't realize it was that late. Her body was aching and tired and she had dipped underwater a couple times, but through sheer will, she kept swimming.

Petra paused for a moment, taking a short break and closed her eyes.

“Ahoy!” Someone shouted off ahead of her.

Petra opened her eyes and saw a boat bobbing not too far off. Fishermen. It took her a second to register what that meant.

“Hello!” Petra, getting a burst of energy, swam faster than before. She grabbed onto the edge of the boat.

“Awful early for a swim, ain't it? Pretty far too,” one of the two men in the boat said.

“It's a long story. Can you take me to shore?”

“Of course. Climb on in,” the other man said.

Petra climbed in from the back and collapsed into one the seats, panting. The cool, morning air caused Petra to shiver violently. One of the men handed her a blanket.

“It's not much, but it'll help until we get to shore.”

Petra took it gratefully and wrapped herself in it. Relieved and semi-warm, and exhausted from swimming all night, she couldn't keep her eyes open and dozed until they got to the beach. One of the men must have called an ambulance while on the boat because there were EMTs (and police) waiting for them.

Petra was quickly checked out, given water, and wrapped in a space blanket, while the police questioned her. She understood why they would have questioned her, she was so tired and her head hurt. She didn't want to do this now. She told them what her sister did, about the blood, and that she didn't know where her sister (or her body) went.

When they asked who they should call, she almost said Rafael, before remembering his phone was gone.

“Jane Villanueva.” She saw the recognition on their faces, likely because of Michael.

Ten minutes later, Petra was wrapped up in a hug from Rafael first, then Jane. While Rafael held her tightly, Jane broke the hug and inspected Petra, tenderly brushing the hair from Petra's face.

While Petra was surprised Jane was being so nice to her after Petra was being so untrusting of her, she felt relief, a fluttering in her chest.

That didn't last long as they rode in the car. There was definite tension between them. Jane clearly didn't know what to say to her, while Rafael awkwardly sat in the backseat. And Petra found that irritation with both of them coming back up, which Petra hated because she had no reason to be angry with both of them. Jane especially. Jane was just being herself, and Petra couldn't fault her for that.

But like always, Petra snapped at Jane, because it was her first instinct.

“You're telling me you're 100% over Rafael?”

It was a horrible question, especially with Rafael sitting right behind them, and Petra could see the panic on Jane's face before she said, “100% is a lot.”

Jane glanced at Rafael before back to Petra, then turning her gaze forward.

They didn't say anything more for the majority of the ride. Shortly before they got to the hotel, Jane brought up that maybe Petra should come back to her house with them. Them. Rafael was living with the Villanueva's since Luisa kicked him out. Petra's stomach turned at the thought, of Jane and Rafael being in the same, tiny house together.

“I don't know how Luisa will feel about you being there,” Rafael said.

“I don't give a shit what she thinks,” Petra snapped. She was too tired to deal with this.

“You might if she tries to kick you out too.”

“I revitalized that hotel. I brought it back to life.”

“I'm not arguing with you, but Luisa is angry and she wants revenge. In her eyes, you're as bad as me.”

Petra understood why Luisa was angry, she had a lot of right to be angry. But Petra wished Luisa could have done this another day, not when she was physically and mentally exhausted.

“Jane, I appreciate the offer.” She really did. The idea of relaxing at Jane's sounded very appealing. “But I'm going to deal with this.”

Petra was fully prepared to deal with Luisa. She knew how to deal with her. What she wasn't prepared for was Luisa thinking she was Anezka. Turns out the whole thing was Luisa's idea, that Anezka was going to put Petra into a storage locker (alive, because Luisa wasn't a killer) and Anezka was going to pretend to be Petra. Which was the dumbest thing she's ever heard, the main reason being after Anezka tried that the first time, Petra had “Not Petra” carved into Anezka's forehead.

But Petra turned up her face in that goofy way her sister smiled and did the accent. Luisa bought it.

Until Anezka showed up, bandaged up like she had gone to a hospital in a cartoon show, and Petra's plan of buying off Luisa had failed.

Of course. Everytime she tried to turn the tables on someone, it backfired and came back and bit. After thirty-some years of fighting, sometimes it felt like she wasn't getting anywhere. One step forward and two steps back.

So when Rafael came to her and said it was her that he wanted to be with, she smiled and kissed him. She ignored that little voice in the back of her head, telling her that it was a bad idea, that it was going to blow up in her face somehow, that, deep down, this wasn't what she wanted. But like always, she ignored it. She ignored it when she cheated on Rafael, or when she stole his sperm and inseminated herself, or anytime she was mean to Jane.

Rafael was one of the few good things in her life and even if she wasn't 100% sure about this, like Jane said, 100% is a lot. She could deal with the actual percentage, for now. Because the thought of going through this alone was terrifying and Rafael was the closest thing in her life, other than her girls, that could bring her her happy ending.


End file.
